How to say NO to an offer
“My husband and I were participating in a swingers party. We found our self with a small group of couples that we met for the first time. Unfortunately, we didn’t like any of the participants. Suddenly a man approached me asking me to join him; I didn’t know how to behave, how to reject him without having him offended”
Sound familiar?
Well, contrary to popular opinion, real swingers are not people who go to bed with anyone. Swingers, like everyone else, are attracted to some people and others are not. And anyway - there will never be a situation where a swingers couple will agree to exchange with another couple just because of some sense of commitment or "I don't like".
Know that, if you choose a swingery lifestyle, you will at least get an invitation from a couple you are not into. It's only natural. But when such a moment comes - it is important to act properly so that no one gets hurt.
In most cases, it is enough to say "no thank you", "not currently" or "maybe another time" to the couple offered you. Most swingers will understand the hint and leave you at ease, without feeling hurt. In this context, it is worth remembering that when you say "maybe another time" to a couple, you also leave yourself open to a future opportunity to exchange relationships with those spouses, and that right now its not right for you.
What if you still have to deal with a particularly stubborn couple (or single participant) who continues to offer you couples exchanges even after saying "maybe for another time"? Well, such situations are quite rare in the swingers world because most swingers know how to respect each other's boundaries, and mostly understand when 'no' is not.
If someone continues to harass you, and you have often told him clearly and unequivocally - we recommend that you contact the party organizers at this point and report them to the same couple or participant, they will already know how to treat the participant most appropriately and may even worry about keeping him away - From the present and future parties.
And finally, the most important thing is, as a pair of Swingers liners, you'll know when to say no to the offers you receive. If you have been offered a couples exchange that you are not interested in, you should be stylistically saying otherwise (polite) so that you will never get unpleasant poles or take part in something you do not really want to do.
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